Daily routine
Wake up either OK or like I was punched in the gut
Vomit nothing out
Cry in the shower
Headphones on for constant music to distract me from having a panic attack or burst in to tears on the way to work
Be distracted by work
Maybe eat lunch
Headphones on and music to zone everything else out
Have at least 2 panic attacks at work if I let my mind wander
Leave work with headphones on to avoid a panic attack on the train
Or my eyes start to tear up on the train
Maybe eat dinner
Watch Netflix or read to stay distracted at home
Sometimes drink at least 1 or 2 glasses of something strong
Get in bed
Attempt to stay distracted
Usually unable to
Burst in to tears that slowly becomes a panic attack I can’t control
Let it run its course for an hour or two
When it’s over fully weep from my broken soul
Pray to God to keep him safe
Fall asleep crying